American Football

NFL’s 5 funniest players for 2024 who always provide the best quotes

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Photo by Michael Hickey/Getty Images

Yes, a certain Bills rookie made the list.

NFL media exposure of all sorts is at an all-time high thanks to the ingenious work of beat reporters, the emergence of social media and availability of info on the World Wide Web, enabling fans everywhere to get to know their players on a more personal level than ever before.

While some players shy away from the spotlight, others embrace it, both on the field and off. Here are five of the NFL’s funniest, most quotable players ahead of the 2024 season and some of their best quotes that earned their spot on the list.

5. Raiders DT Christian Wilkins

New Las Vegas Raiders defensive tackle Christian Wilkins has always had a personality worth mic-ing up. His taunts at opposing teams are priceless in a way that you probably can’t walk away fully annoyed at him, even if he just drove your QB face down into the dirt.

…OK, you’d probably be annoyed at the moment, but if you ever heard the play-back on

That time he taunted Giants OL Billy Price à la Happy Gilmore:

The price is wrooong, Billy!

This absolutely ridiculous (read: fabulous) entrance to the 2019 NFL Draft:

When an opposing team’s player called him ugly:

I’m cute! My mama told me I’m handsome.

Oh, then there’s that time he stole Alvin Kamara’s towel. This dude is priceless. Protect him at all costs.

4. Bills WR Keon Coleman

Admittedly, Buffalo Bills rookie wide receiver Keon Coleman was the inspiration for this article. I don’t know if he’ll be any good once he steps on the field, but for the moment at least, the Bills have a pretty bright personality in the locker room to keep them on their toes.

That time he toured the Bills stadium for the first time:

Keon Coleman says he spent 30 seconds in the stadium, and during that time, he scored three imaginary touchdowns.
A record amount given the time, he says

— katherine fitzgerald (@kfitz134) April 27, 2024

That time he gave shopping advice during his introductory presser as a Buffalo Bill:

I shop like my mama. I get my coats in the summertime. You’ve gotta shop a season or two before, just in case. And, you know, it be cheaper.

At the NFL combine, discussing what he does outside of football:

Coleman: Chill at the house… golf… bowl a little bit.

Interviewer: You golf?

Coleman: I’m Tiger ‘Wish-He-Could’, not Tiger Woods.

3. Saints RB Jamaal Williams

2022 rushing touchdown leader Jamaal Williams is authentically himself. He’s a self-proclaimed nerd with a distinctly animated affect, which shines through in pretty much every interview he gives, most of which are riddled with references to anime.

On why he likes playing in the rain:

I love it all. The rain, cause I think the rain slows everybody else down, so I feel like… how can I say it? I feel like a mermaid [playing in the rain]… I feel like a mermaid, and everyone else is just dogs swimming. I be feeling like I’m floating out there. I think it’s the rain. Like SpongeBob.

That time he gave us more animated descriptors of playing in a game with different types of weather throughout:

It was just, like, a good overall day of everything. I felt like SpongeBob for a minute, right, then it started snowing. Felt like Frozen, like “Alright, here we go! Olaf time!” Then, it went back to raining, so then I felt like SpongeBob.

That time he explained why men who like anime are the partners you should be chasing:

Girls, NFL player Jamaal Williams explains why you’ve got to date the nerds pic.twitter.com/IYDZQtpt8o

— Dexerto (@Dexerto) September 25, 2021

2. Bucs QB Baker Mayfield

You either love Bucs QB Baker Mayfield… or you hate him. There’s not a ton of room in between. But even if you hate him (do you really?), you have to admit — this dude is absolutely hilarious and might have a career ahead of him as a B-List actor once his NFL career wraps.

The entire “At Home With Baker Mayfield” Progressive commercial series:

All of those times that he found a way to work rap lyrics into his press conferences with a straight face:

Baker casually dropping Lil Wayne: [The defense] made great plays when they needed to. I think Myles [Garrett] took the approach of, you know, real G’s moving in silence like lasagna.

Baker casually dropping DMX: That’s just the necessary mindset of doing whatever it takes. You know, having to, after that first quarter, stop, shut ‘em down, open up shop. That’s just how Ruff Ryders roll.

Driving the crowd absolutely wild with these moves:

1. 49ers TE George Kittle

Under the 20-or-so-odd pounds of protective padding that 49ers tight end George Kittle wears every game day is the heart and soul of a 10-year-old child — one who has a lot to say, most of which is totally out of pocket. Good luck predicting what’s next to come out of his mouth at any given moment. Just know, it’s probably going to be entertaining.

After Nick Bosa snagged an interception in Week 8 of 2019 against the Carolina Panthers:

Kittle: BOOOOOOOSA!!!!!!! I am so happy he’s on my team! Bosa’s not bad. You know, I actually think he’s from Canada, eh?

Teammate: Is he?

Kittle: I don’t know. I think he looks like he drinks a lot of maple syrup. It’s where he gets those big biceps. All the maple syrup’s actually stored in his quads. I think his quads, it’s a mixture of maple syrup and diesel, so you don’t get very good miles per gallon.

On the sideline before the 49ers’ second-half comeback in the NFC Championship:

Kittle: I can’t wait until after the game, when I get to say, “You know what, they had us in the first half!”

A totally emotionless Brock Purdy: …yeah…

Discussing Harry Potter with comedian Kevin Hart:

Kevin Hart: Did your mom make you [read]? Did your dad make you?

Kittle: That’s what I did as a kid — read.

Hart: You read on your own?

Kittle: Yeah.

Hart: [pans to camera] What a f*cking loser. What an idiot.

Kittle: At least I can read…

Enjoy more of Kittle’s best moments in this perfect compilation.

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