It’s the holiday treat you’ve been waiting for!
If you’ve ever wanted to experience the exquisite joy of biting Evander Holyfield’s ear and get high as balls while doing it, well Mike Tyson has you covered.
New: Mike Tyson and Evander Holyfield have partnered up to create and deliver “Holy Ears,” edibles in the shape of an ear
“If i was on cannabis, I wouldn’t have bit his ear,” Tyson said, referring to the 1997 fight when the boxer bit Holyfield’s ear pic.twitter.com/WNjdi5Tnlz
— philip lewis (@Phil_Lewis_) November 14, 2022
“If I was on cannabis, I wuouldn’t have bit his ear” is a hell of a statement. Just digest than one for a sec.
I thought biting ears was more of a bath salts thing, but I’ll have to trust in Mike Tyson’s judgement — which is a sentence nobody has ever said in the history of human existence. I just want to know who’s in the market to buy edibles and they scan the shelves saying to themselves “Hmmm… gummy bears, butterflies, those peach ring things… OH AN EAR!”
To be fair, the ears have been around for much of the year, previously called “Mikes Bites” but now he’s partnered with Evander to rename them and get the endorsement of (checks notes) THE MAN WHO HAD HIS EAR BITTEN OFF BY MIKE TYSON!
At least it’s a conversation starter, and also a surefire way to make movie night awkward when you’re hanging out and watching Pineapple Express while passing around a bag of THC-laded Holyfield ears.
The name “Holy Ears” is really unsettling too, especially around the holiday season. I get the play on words, but there’s something unsettling about the double-entendre here, especially because it makes me think of an ear with holes in it.
Look, this is all bad, and I’m not going to narc on you for enjoying edibles because it’s 2022 and that’s dumb — but maybe don’t get ones shaped like ears? It just seems too gross.
