Max would be a nightmare.
It’s Miami Grand Prix weekend, and naturally F1 is looking for interesting ways to tie in with a burgeoning U.S. audience. On Friday they imagined their top drivers as NFL quarterbacks, and this is a discussion we need to have.
There’s absolutely no doubt that these drivers are the greatest in the world in their field. Put them behind the wheel and they’re unstoppable monsters of reaction, bravery, timing, and holding their pee for three hours straight. Some of these skills translate to playing quarterback, and some — well, they don’t at all.
Let’s imagine that we’re just porting these players over, as is. What happens if you put the greatest stars of Formula 1 under center?
Best F1 driver turned quarterback: Lewis Hamilton
You knew I was going to say Lewis the second this topic came up, didn’t you? This one is painfully obvious. I think there’s an argument you could make for George Russell’s height and composure, or Fernando Alonso’s love on contact — but nah, it’s Lewis.
First of all: Star quality. He’s absolutely used to being in the spotlight and is fine thriving in it. Secondly, he’s a master of staying cool under pressure, not just on the track — but while Mercedes is struggling. You’ve never seen him publicly lose it with Toto, outside of a small spat here or there, which is normal in a QB and coach relationship.
Hamilton also has the athletic background needed. He played both soccer and cricket in high school, and said he would have tried to go pro in either sport if he didn’t become a driver. All this works together to become a guy who has all the skills to play — except the whole “needing to throw a football with his arm” thing.
Worst F1 driver turned quarterback: Max Verstappen
Just imagine for one second how horrific Max would be on an NFL team. Here’s a dude who struggles to get along with one teammate, let alone 52. Also, playing quarterback is inherently about accountability and accepting blame — even when something isn’t your fault.
Playing QB is about being a media lightning rod. The best are able to deflect blame from others and stay cool under pressure. Verstappen is the kind of peerless perfectionist that he would be great in preparation, but the second something started going wrong he’d scream at his offensive line, yell at his receivers, blame his offensive coordinator, throw his helmet at the bench, tip over the Gatorade container, and then wait for his mom to defend him on social media.
I imagine that scene in Any Given Sunday when the entire team stops blocking for Willie Beamen because of his ego and lets him get ground into a fine paste on the field to teach him a lesson. It would be like that, except Max wouldn’t learn the lesson and just keep getting obliterated for 17 straight weeks.
This would be absolute hell.
Funniest F1 driver turned quarterback: Yuki Tsunoda
I mean… come out. That would just be hilarious.
