Stephen R. Sylvanie-USA TODAY Sports
This is the most important bracket you will see today.
March Madness is here, and so are the brackets that will rank literally everything, from fast food establishments to 90s-era television shows.
Well, this bracket is completely different, because this bracket is based on pride and my ability to fight completely different real and mythical animals with a sword.
Do I have experience fighting with a sword? Little to none, other than self-taught YouTube videos. Do I make up for this lack of experience with irrational confidence and the blinding pride of a 22-year old who watches too much anime? Absolutely!
The way this bracket works is that the winner of each game is the one that I think would defeat me quicker in this tournament. As the animals and people keep advancing, I hypothetically gain more knowledge and techniques, making myself tougher to beat as the tournament goes on.
Without further ado, here is the bracket, complete with my predictions and thoughts.
So, on first reaction, there are a lot of Wildcat teams in the tournament. In this exercise, I’m fighting one Wildcat. However, Northern Kentucky’s mascot name is Norse.
Yes, Norse.
Like as in the people of Norway.
I’ll be fighting like Jon Snow in the Battle of the Bastards, a tough bout for sure.
There are also two Gaels in this tournament, both on the same side of the bracket. I’m not exactly sure what a Gael is, but apparently it’s a person from the Gaelic speaking people of Ireland, so I’m not sure how threatening they are in a fight.
Fighting a devil with a katana is some real anime stuff that I would 100% welcome. If given multiple tries (a la Dr. Strange bargaining with Dormammu), I think I can beat the Blue Devil. The Sun Devil? No chance. He’s got the powers of the sun and a pitchfork, it would be a win for him. An interesting fight would be against the NC State Wolfpack. Because it’s not just one wolf, I would have to fight the whole pack, which could cause problems.
If I’m given the opportunity, with no time limit, this tournament could go in my favor. However, I’ll leave that up to speculation and the consensus of the public, who will definitely back me in a fight with an elephant.
